Marriage is not made in Heaven

Not too long ago, there has been talks on Hong Kong pop singer Andy Lau Tak Wah's impending marriage to his long-time Chinese-Malaysian girlfriend Carol Zhu. Michael Miu Kiu-Wai and Felix Wong Yat Wah, two famous Hong Kong stars, were supposed to attend his wedding and then before the great day arrived, suddenly there was a report that the three-day wedding ceremony to be held in Kuala Lumpur had been cancelled after Lau had found out that Zhu was not pregnant. Now, one'd probably start wondering what type of man is the star to be with a girl for 24 years and to deny her marriage and a status. Marriage, for sure now, is not made in heaven and if you would to drag Buddha into this discussion, I suppose Buddha did not express any specific rules and regulations regarding marriage, not unless you consider the Third Precept Kāmesu micchācāra veramaī sikkhāpada samā I undertake the training rule to abstain from sexual misconduct as a rule for marriage.For all I know, marriage is a personal and individual concern and in Buddhism, it is probably not a religious duty. Now, what do you say?

Comments

Sathira said…
I believe Buddha is Dhamma and Dhamma is Buddha!Please correct me if I am wrong. I am not an expert in Buddha's teaching! I agreed with you that marriage is not made on Heaven. Is marriage a Dhukka? Hahaha......

As for training rules, I believe that training rules are for training purpose. If we are the Perfect one, we don't need the training rules. I believe no one is perfect in this world except the Buddha, that's why we have this training rules.

I believe the rules for marriage should be more than one! Do we mean the rest of the four training rules do not apply for our marriage life?

Training Rule no.1 Abstain from Killing - e.g killing someone's spouse to marry with their partners?

Training Rule no.2 Abstain from Stealing - e.g Taking stealing someone's spouse without the permission from their partners? Elope with other people's spouse?

Training Rule no.3 Abstain from Sexual Misconduct - " What would be the consequences if we were to find out our spouse has breached this training rule?"

Training Rule no.4 - Abstain from Telling Lies - "Do we want our spouse to cheat us?".

Training no.5 - Abstain from Intoxicationg Food and Drinks - Who knows people may break all the training after they have consumed the intoxicating food or drinks?

As for Andy Lau's case, my humble view is that the Law Of " Cause And Effect " applies in his case. We can't put the blame on only one party! Anyway, we do not know what is the actual reason/s behind the scene? Agree?

May you be well and happy always!
footiam said…
Sathira, I can't really see if Buddha is Dhamma and vice versa and I do think that marriage is not made in heaven but about marriage being dukkha, well, I do think how we make it. It could be nirvana, who knows if you are married to an angel; but one thing for certain, it is not permanent! It ends when you die!
I don't think I mean that only one of the precepts can be applied to marriages. I think I like your views.Thanks and never mind Andy Lau!
Sathira said…
If I am not mistaken, the Buddha did tell his disciples that after he has left this world, his teaching (the Dhamma) shall be the main guidance.

Now the Budhha has gone, there is no physical body of the Budhha around in this world. I believe the Dhamma should be the "Buddha" now. Anyway, Buddha practised what he taught us and attained Buddhahood right? Would you agree with me that there is a close link there?

I was just kidding when I post the question of "Is marriage a Dukkha?" Anyway, I agreed with you it depends on individual perception.

Don't worry, I understand you don't mean only one precept can be applied to marriage life.

Hope to hear your view again.

Keep up you good dhammaduta work!

Sadhu! Sadhu! Sadhu!
debasis said…
Footiam you should read Liudmila"s post on 10 misconduct in Buddhism yes Buddha has said sexual misconduct so to say premarital sex relationship as an offence but in day of materialism and science who cares but they suffer
footiam said…
I understand now what you mean by Buddha is Dhamma and Dhamma is Buddha. Thanks! And I really like all your long comments.Each time, I learn something new. Do keep them coming!
Liudmila said…
As for me, marriage is biological and juridical necessity to grow kids, first of all, and the institution to protect the week part of the copy -the woman.
footiam said…
That means it is man made.